Category Archives: Family

Generations? Generation? Are You Listening? Getting It Right

dronesofheaven

“You are a snowflake!” 

“You are a boomer!” 

If you ever heard one of these statements, I hope you realize they are insults. Insults to generations. Insults to children, parents and grandparents. 

Continue reading Generations? Generation? Are You Listening? Getting It Right

Stop The Judgement! Love as you are loved

Earlier this week, I read the story of a young man and his wife who announced they were separating after 20 years of marriage. (Separation is not divorce, but who knows.) He also shared he was “not a Christian”. 

I met this young man over 20 years ago. An up and coming author, soon to be church leader, he was engaging and real. 

Continue reading Stop The Judgement! Love as you are loved

Requiem For A Friend Part 2

Today, your obituary with a memorial service date appeared. Looking at your picture, tears welled to my eyes.  (It is now Friday, and tomorrow we gather to say “good bye”.) 

But are we ever going to say, “good bye”? I am not talking about the spiritual piece, for that is so important, but the places he will be “seen”.  In his children and grandchildren, for instance. In many of the folks who gather tomorrow. In the people of the community and the region. In places and people, many will never know. 

The impartation remains. The legacy he has left continues. (How many for so many reasons will not be there, that he sowed into? I wonder. Proverbs 13:22: “A good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children.”

What does it look like? How will it take shape? 

Many years ago, he and I were praying about a situation and I was struck by his childlike faith. 

One of my favorite areas of his life, that I admired about my friend, was the area of prayer. When he prayed, you could sense the humility and the wonderment in his voice, whether it be for an individual, the church fellowship, or a community and region. The simplicity of his prayer, in the expectation, was always there. 

I recollect a time, he and I, along another local pastor traveled, to a prayer summit. It was a great time of fellowship, and friendship. (Perhaps one of the most fun things that happened, was that the three of us roomed together. It was about 4 in the morning and there was a knock on the bathroom door. He asked me what I was I doing sleeping in the tub. I explained to him that the snoring didn’t allow me to sleep so I figured I ought to come into the bathroom and pray a while, laying in the tub with a couple of towels inside of it. He just laughed and said what do you expect from old men.) He had been instrumental in our area and bringing leaders of fellowships together to pray for the region, the state and the nations. His times of prayer and praying were one of the many reasons I was attracted to him in our early days together. 

And he was never too prideful to ask for prayer. (Not all leaders were or are like that.) He would sometimes share the most painful or personal things to be prayed for. He was authentic. 

He desired to see unity. And he did not just pray for it, he worked hard to maintain it. 

Seeking unity was one of the things I truly admired about my friend. His willingness to do as much as he did for the cause of unity. It could be a pastor’s meeting or a get together with others.

In the late 90’s, I had a dream, related to unity. He and 3 other leaders were in that dream. We began to talk about it, and he encouraged me to contact the others. We met in his home. And the dream began to be real. Thank God for his heart for unity. Our first meeting took place a month later. From around New England and New York, they came. 60 men and women.  

Out of the five us who originally met, four of you have gone home to be with the Father. Out of that 60, there are 7 of us left in ministry.)

He often opened his Church Fellowship and the building to a call for Unity across the region. Whether it was a night of worship or a night of Prayer or simply a gathering of leaders to break bread he never thought twice about it. He truly was an ambassador for the sake of unity often crossing barriers that others had put in place that people make feel welcome. 

He taught me to include, rather than to exclude. 

A few years later I was going through a very tough time, losing my mom, stepmom, spiritual dad and having my son in a coma in just a few short months. Besides the phone calls, he made trips to let me know as long “as I swing the bat” I was still in the game.

Death is neither timely, nor convenient.

I thank you for the heart and thinking, that you have shared with me.

I will be adding to this in the near future.

Requiem For A Friend Part 1

I have put this off, because I was afraid it would be true if I wrote it. A week ago, I went to your home and the next day you were gone. 25 years.  Nearly half my life and a quarter of yours, we were friends. Despite our different backgrounds we became brothers, close friends, kinfolk. 

18 years my senior. A generation. A nothingness and a forever. 

This week I rode my motorcycle on one of the trips we used to ride together on. In remembrance. To see, if I would see you. A little celebration of your life.  Continue reading Requiem For A Friend Part 1

An Apostle Of Non-Violence

Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. MLK 

A Thursday night. I had just come in for dinner. The table was set. The food was coming out. My dad was just walking away from the TV news. Walter Cronkite was just winding down when he received word of King’s wounding. Flustered he read the news but then a commercial break and it was only later that an anonymous voice announced his death. Continue reading An Apostle Of Non-Violence

What Is Your Plan?

leejohndrowteamDead at 57.

This morning I was writing a children’s book and adding a chapter to it. In this book I went back 30, 40 even 50 years digging out the memory that fit the circumstance I was working on. (Why waste a good memory?)

My main character was looking at an old picture. (Here he was in 1882 and seeing a picture from the 1970s…) I thought who might be the person?

I came to a conclusion. While I was writing, I thought, why not see where they are at. The third entry on my search was their obituary. 57 years old. Cancer.

Being 60 this is not my first run at sadness or shock.

I sat there for a moment and remembered our first meeting. The details were as if it was yesterday. As I looked at the picture I saw the person when they 19, full of life.

Each of us has a path, a journey. A place we are coming from and a place we are going to.

2016 is a year of potential. Or a year of the same. Or even a year of floundering and sadness.

My old friend. I am not sure what their journey was like. The obituary was but a painting of a life lived. Few details. Children, no spouse and a couple of friends who wrote their expressions of sadness.

I don’t know their life after I moved to a new state.

You and I, well we have a lot to do with our painting.

In a day where people put more thought into getting a drivers license than a marriage license, people often devote themselves to what they want rather than what may well be best for them. Conversations may well be about “hopes and dreams” but but when push comes to shove, what are they doing?

Many await God while He is awaiting them. (I am not talking about salvation, but about seeing change occur in one’s life.)

What is your plan? Do you have steps to your plan? (Because usually if you have no steps, you have no plan.)What have you changed today to move you towards the finished plan?

I find that if you have a plan, life is a little easier. (Just like if you have a budget you find you have more money and less stress. People make 2016 the year of your budget!!!)

Many years ago I would meet in a restaurant with friends on a weekly basis. The owner was very old man. Each week he saw me set down to have coffee with friends. And as I sat he would approach tables (including ours)with the same questions. “Do you want to get ahead? How many hours do you work? How many hours do you sleep? What are you doing with the other 70 hours?”

It is a real group of questions.

2016 can be better or worse than 2015. In the end a lot will depend on what you and I want to see it shaped into.

What Is The Question?

2015-09-05 12.52.11As a child we learned a different way on some levels. I think part of my perspective as a child was predicated on asking the questions. Why? Where? What? I believe I was instructed and taught to look for answers. To be critical in my approach to things. Even skeptical. But to stop there would have been error. If I did not believe something, I wanted to prove my thinking. Continue reading What Is The Question?

Lightning, Revelation And Rewards

David finishing up in Swanzey.
David finishing up in Swanzey.

Last night I had a dream where when I tried to speak strikes of lightning would appear. The lightning did not cause destruction. It changed things. They became brighter. Colors began to become vivid. Things that were old became new. I could see people become refreshed in the atmosphere where these bolts were.

Job 28:25-28
“When He imparted weight to the wind And meted out the waters by measure,When He set a limit for the rain And a course for the thunderbolt,Then He saw it and declared it; He established it and also searched it out.”And to man He said, ‘Behold, the fear of the Lord, that is wisdom; And to depart from evil is understanding.'” Continue reading Lightning, Revelation And Rewards