All posts by Lee Johndrow

Lee is the Senior Leader of Abundant Grace Fellowship Church in Keene, NH He is the father of five wonderful children. Married for over 26 years to his wife Tina. Loving life with family, friends, faith, fun and food!

The Wisdom To know The Diffference

dronesofheaven

Years ago, I wrote a story for the newspaper on acceptance. I talked about the stages of grief for part of it and the acceptance or finality that was required to move ahead. Life is like that. Sometimes to make a change you have to “agree” with something or accept it to make the changes necessary.

For instance when you accept there is corruption in the government, you are posed with two choices. Do nothing or do something? No matter who you are, change and the ability to change are hardwired into you.

The results of acceptance are that you accept the outcome, deny the wanted answer or recognize the futility of something. But there is an also an acceptance of who you are and what you can accomplish.

Too often we “settle” for something because we assume it will not get any better or never change. I would be lying to you to say that I have not had a moment or two of that type.

There is a famous prayer.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Reinhold Niebuhr

My concern for a while has been people accept less than what is God’s best for them or His provision for them. Life is subject to change. All of it. Every time. Either you choose to believe the scriptures or you do not.

You can choose what you change.

Can God raise the dead? Have others raised the dead? So why not you?
Can God heal people from cancer? Have people been healed from cancer? So why not you?
Did God multiply the fish? Find the coin? Do you know people who have had magnificent provision in their lives? So why not you?

We do not have to “accept” the substandard or even the norm. Now, right here I will say what you believe will be important. Do you believe God raises the dead, heals the sick? Do you believe you have the ability to change? Do you accept the fact that you “deserve” good? We can choose excellence or better every time. And I accept and I never doubt that God is on my side and moving things ahead for me. What you accept will change over time. What you accept will determine going forward motion. Your acceptance can lead to reward and favor.

What you do with “answers” will have a lot to do with your responses. No does not mean never. It is not semantics but a reality founded in truth. You will always have the choice to accept or reject. Those actions will be based on the premise of what you believe. So, if you use that prayer, be sure to rely on His wisdom and not yours. You will find much of life is changeable to those who believe.

REST-He is in it!

I woke up this morning from a dream where an old friend of mine was involved. We had been invited to a meeting. We were staying in a large hotel. We had beautiful rooms. And a noise.  In the dream there was this “mystery” sound. It took me all night to isolate and determine what and where it was. It has taken me much of the morning to understand the thought process behind it.

Yesterday I spoke about set at a table, set in place and set in motion. I believe that is where much of the church is right now.  What is going on? Where is the motion? Where is the “answer”?

I was talking to a friend last night. A savvy business person and good friend, we talked about the current state of life. Like he and myself, many have felt like the motion of things has stopped. We discussed the reasons. Without getting into lots of detail we cleared governments, economies and people. No, something has people in a place of “slowed” or a holding pattern. Even as I thought about the holding pattern, I thought what it was a prelude to. Landing, disembarking, new positions and places all follow. The holding pattern can be discouraging, as it can create impatience or anxiety. Especially when you look out the window and see others “in the air,” circling alongside of you.  (Die Hard 2 maybe?)

My answer is, many are in the place of “what’s next.” Often we see it in an individual or two, but it does seem like many are waiting. What if how well you wait determined how well you “land”?

In my dream we were distracted until late into the night, looking for the source of the noise. When we got close to it, it seemed as if it changed. Direction, sound, volume. I finally got into bed and got some sleep(rest) only to hear the sound a few hours later. I jumped out of bed, opening the door and I saw the source of the noise. A type of “knocker” had been affixed to my friend’s door. I opened the door and there he was, asleep. He was worn out from the night’s explorations. The sun poured through the window.

Only when I was in my room and resting was I able to determine the source of the sound. It was on a door. As we moved about the hotel the previous night, we heard it but could not locate it. There is a new day coming. The Lord is behind the “distractions” but not as you perhaps think. He is not making it hard for you, He is making it easy. There is rest He is calling you to. And only when you are in that rest will you hear the sound. The sound of Him at the door calling you to a new day. A day that is bright. Why a door? Because He is not making this hard or difficult.

I personally just went through a frenzied time. A time that began with a flat tire a few weeks ago. And then a car accident and my wife’s injuries. Finances, vehicle and residence, all seemed to take a hit. It is not “over” but I felt the Lord asking for trust. He is knocking. He has knocked at many people’s “door.” The answer is “open the door.” (It is like, how do you remove the darkness? Turn on the light!)

This is a season of unraveling of thinking, discarding of old thoughts and process and the listening for the sound. My answer in the dream was “right there.” But we could not find it. We did the room to room search, the examination, the interviewing of others…everything but “lie down.”

REST-He is in it!

 

 

Was His Face Marred for a reason?

Sloth-from the movie the Goonies
Sloth-from the movie the Goonies

I have been meditating on the marring or the misshaping of His face in the last week or so. I read this scripture…
Just as many were astonished at you, My people, So His appearance was marred more than any man And His form more than the sons of men.

What is the connection, I thought? People astonished at me? At you? The preceding verse speaks of not being in a rush. Of God going before you and being behind you.

But His face? When I felt touched to think about it, I thought it had to be “marred” not just fulfill a prophecy but to do something else.

It’s funny. The Lord had been stirring in me Psalm 27 and the phrase about “the land of the living.” And for nearly a week this statement has been typed on my computer with nothing added. “Was His Face Marred for a reason?” I would look at it multiple times a day. Today I began to clear the deck so to speak. And here just a few scriptures later in Isaiah 53, “For He was cut off from the land of the living;”

What is the land of the living? I felt this. A stream in a wilderness. A family of descendants. Where life is.

The other day, I felt that His face must be marred to “balance” it for us. He had no beauty it says, nothing to draw us. If the holes were still visible in His hands, what about other wounding?

I came to this conclusion about His face. I realized it while watching the Goonies with my grandkids. When Jacob saw Sloth he could only ask “why is his face like that?” I think we ask the same thing about the face of Jesus. Why is it like that? Why will it not draw you? “He has no form or comeliness; And when we see Him, There is no beauty that we should desire Him.” Isaiah 53:2

With this, “He was despised and rejected— a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief. We turned our backs on him and looked the other way. He was despised, and we did not care.”

Not only to accept him, but to serve Him, we must accept the difficult parts. I think we have looked at things through the human lens and made Him “palatable” to our way of thinking. Hence, we “mar” His beauty. We in our unredeemed state could not accept His goodness.

We often see people dealing with shame not able to look others in the eyes. Perhaps that is what happened. Or even in the “I am better than you” mode, underrating the spiritual value of goodness. Pushing it away.

Whatever the reason, my final thoughts are that we tried to make Him like us, when His goal was to make us like Him.

How Cool Was Fathers Day?

I can only begin to tell you. I would love to tell you it was the presents. They were wonderful! Come on! A sizable Starbucks gift card, A Duck Dynasty shirt, a “grandfathers” shirt, a new book on Gun Control, the Rush Hour 3 movie collection or the cards and the notes. All those were good! But was amazing was the…

Presence of my children. To be able to play with Naomi, to eat dinner with my wife that she did not prepare. To sit with Jordan, Mariah and Jacob at the table. To look through an old album with Matt and Cass. To have my daughter Alyssa be there. To watch Matt playing with Jordan. To say it was good was an understatement.

To miss my children Tyler (And Emily) and Amy (And Manley) as they did what they are in the season for. Ty and Emily preparing for the newest grandchild. Amy readying for her reception next week.

Life is for the living. Meant to be lived. Tap into family.

 

Preside Where You Reside

Hitting the target
A word for today.

Yesterday during worship I heard a few things and felt like I needed to set on them for a bit. During a dream last night I received more to what was in play. They had to do with the season we have entered into.

I heard three phrases-

Setting a table. I felt like two things were in play here. One was that we were to be a table. A place of community and respite for those who had needs of the Lord. Not needs of us, but needing Him, though we might be part of the answer. The second part was He was calling us to the table of His fellowship. We know that He prepared a table for us amongst His enemies. There is a calling to a place of rest in Him. The more we know of His rest, the more we know of Him.

Setting in place. This is a season where God is setting in place His people. To fulfill His purpose, I may not be able to fulfill my calling where I was so He moves me. God sets people in place. And He allows for people to be set according to God and one that will be done by man. I literally saw people being “screwed” into place for their purpose. God is allowing no “wriggle” room in that which He has called forth. No longer will short term vision suffice. This is clearly for the long haul.

At the same time, I saw a jewelry setting. Any real jeweler knows that a stone is crafted to produce the most goodness out of its cutting or shaping. In the natural a master jeweler will review the stone to faceted or cut. After research he will decide what is to be done in the process of faceting.  The Lord does this as well. It may be years of watching the “raw” stone before adding a facet. More before the stone adds another. At some point, the stone will be set. A proper setting is devised to release the largest amount of light and brilliance through a gem. A gem can be shiny laying on a piece of black velvet, but its fire and glimmer will never be fulfilled. Even a magnificent stone can be diminished by the wrong setting. The correct setting will allow light to bounce off the inner cuts deep within the stone, refracting and reflecting.

Be willing to be set. Not my will but your will be done.

Set in motion. There are motions that you have set in play and those that the Lord has set in motion. There is a rhythm of God that can be seen being revealed in lives. When the scripture spoke of “waiting” on the Lord, it was not talking of a sitting still, contemplative repose, but a tying in to what the Lord was doing, where He was going and how He was moving. Being “set in motion” is a place of moving. Why am I here? Where am I going? Those are familiar refrains of those who have tied into the Lord.

In the mid 90’s the Lord had given me a vision of a chess board and the pieces being moved about. He shared with me the value of each piece and what life would mean to myself and others moving forward. Too many have wanted to be like Peter and John and build a tabernacle where He is, never realizing He is not stopping or being constrained. There is something mystical about being in Him and knowing not where you go, but knowing it is Him. One of the largest ideas for me to conquer was the moves that I have encountered over my years in Him. And what about those times where it seemed like I was set aside or not moving?

No four….

And then I heard “preside where you reside.” The word “preside” means this: to exercise guidance, direction, or control; to occupy the place of authority. God has given you an influence. He has established you in heavenly places and yet He has given you a sphere of influence, according to the measure or metron He has established, you have received AND you judge to be in you!

God will use you if you allow Him to.

  • By your fellowship He will increase you and your revelation of who He is and who you are.
  • By your placement and where you are set.
  • By your acceptance of His movings.

 

 

A Letter To My Children On Fathers Day

In the arms of my father(I have the great sweater!)
In the arms of my father(I have the great sweater!)

Letter to my kids…

Dear Tyler, Matt, Cass, Amy and Alyssa. (And all the grandkids!)

If for some reason I do not catch up to you this weekend, I want you to know…

I love you! I love you! I love you!

I love each of you in a special way. Ask Tina. What an awesome child each of you is.

I always wanted to be there even when I couldn’t. How many times was that? To save you, to rescue you. You know the times when you called. (Dads are superheros minus those tights. Did I ever tell you I was Superman one year and my mom made me wear tights? To a Cub Scout pack meeting!)

I am here because of a great dad who made a lot of mistakes. I have followed in his footsteps. I have made a lot of mistakes. You will too probably. But if you are willing to learn, to ask and allow yourself the love and correction of those who care about you, you will be better. I probably let you down along the way. Bad clothes, wild hair, terrible jokes-but I am pretty sure that is part of being a dad! Today I remembered a time with each of you that was special and it brought tears to my eyes. But you are here! (And take pictures-you can always be the embarrassment to your own children!)

I love just being with you. Seeing you smile. Seeing you happy. Even now, all these years later, if I could just protect you I would! To know that you are happy is important. I cannot fix in your life what I could when you were young. But I can still hug you, love you and care about you. There is no favorite kid status in my life. Each of you is my favorite.

Life is too important to waste. Too good to dwell on “what isn’t.” Nothing is more important than family and friends. Build well. Life is like oil and vinegar. One cleanses and stings, while the other covers and comforts. Both are necessary to your future, to your today. A couple of quick thoughts.

Your family-if you work on this, so many other things will change for you. It is not about gifts or presents (Though they are fun!) but about interacting and knowing it makes you who you are. Devote yourself to this area and watch other things happen well. When this is strong other areas absorb the strength. Please do not forsake your family!

Your lovelife-Some of you are figuring this out. Some of you are waiting. While the other things I have to say can rebound and bounce, this area is breakable. It requires the mind of a weightlifter, strengthening the “muscles” by daily lifting. Do you add oil or vinegar to your life together? Tina and I have not done it all right, but 20 plus years we are still working on it.

Your spiritual life-God will never leave you nor forsake you. How you pursue Him is your choice. But if you desire change in your life, He is a necessary part. He loves you greater than I and has the ability to help you if you let Him. My life would not be what it is nor would you be on so many levels without Him.

Your friends-One of the most important pieces of your life. Choose well, even having to let go of some. Can you cry with them? Laugh? Who you choose determines a lot in the quality of your life. Do they add water or vinegar?

Your Worklife-I think you all know where I stand on this. Ask yourself this- “Am I in the right business or profession?” Remembering the following will help with this decision “Do what you like and you will never have to work.” My own is “love your work and work is love.”

Your Financial Life-I encourage you to think now and often. I have made lots of money and lost lots of money. Your choices here will help you do better in other areas. Get help. Do not be an instantaneous, microwave person. Learn now and live then!

Your physical and mental life-This is on you. No one else can do it. You know my motto. Daily vacations! Get outside-get away. I know it is not always “possible” but do not let life swallow you up. Evaluate your choices now, not later. Take a walk. Climb a mountain.

With all that said, will you have fun? Today? Everyday? Gosh I hope so! I love each of you so much.

Life can be fun! Whether it was the time where we went shopping like people with the munchies while Tina was gone and the root beer exploded. Motorcycle rides. Camping in the wilderness. Losing the brakes. Learning to drive. Climbing trees. Going to farms. Baseball games. Stupid movies (Didn’t everybody watch Gremlins or Goonies?) or dumb shows. Live life on purpose. With intent!

Made a dumb choice? Laugh! There will be another time. Made a good choice-Don’t gloat, the dumb choice may be right around the corner! Do not be upset. You cannot achieve cosmic consciousness by contemplating cauliflower.

Dad is always a phone call away. I have some of the most amazing children anyone could ever ask for. That’s right. I am talking to you! Look in the mirror and say “Dad says I am awesome!” (I do!) Call me. I love hearing your voice!

Trust me: Wherever I am or ever will be, I am thinking of you and smiling because I love you!

Your Dad

My Dad-I Miss Him

My Dad
My father and grandmother

I penned this a year ago. Being a dad is not easy. Not being a dad when you can is worse.

This week is the celebration of Father’s Day. If you were looking for a list, I am probably not the right person and this is not the right place. I have made my share of mistakes. Even after the birth of my youngest daughter, there were things I was still “working on.” And as I look around I see that I am not the only one who figured it out the hard way. But I credit my dad and few other “dads” with standing with me during difficult times. Continue reading My Dad-I Miss Him

Mr. Arbuckle and His Small Farm

BARROCK1Living in the small rural neighborhood I did there were lots of little farms. One of these small farms was owned by Mr. Arbuckle.

Over time I learned a lot about life, farming and labor from him. He and his wife had retired from Pratt & Whitney aircraft. They had moved down here from Putney Vermont when jobs were plentiful. Their home sat on the end of the road. On one side was the small garage and barn, while across the street was their home.

When I first moved to the small community, driving by I would see his large German Shepherd. Jet black in color it would bark and pull at the chain for every passerby. (One time it got loose and attacked a neighborhood girl. Not too long after his new dog Emmy, a monster St. Bernard appeared.) I used to travel by his home to get to the main road.

One day through the relationship of another neighbor, Mr. Harrrison, I was introduced to him. He was looking for a young person to help with the chores about his small place.

I soon became his right hand man(I was only 8 or so, helping him a couple of times a day for a quarter each time. I would go down in the morning and feed the chickens and geese, gather their eggs and check for critters! Once a week I would shovel chicken manure out into a pile for summer growing. I would have to shoosh the geese out because if they got excited in the small coop it could be dangerous.

I remember at one point someone gave him this black and white Barred Plymouth Rock rooster. It had been hard enough with the other roosters. What a mean bird. Every day he would fly up in my face and attack me. Finally I could not take it, so taking the five gallon pail of water I poured it over him 2 or 3 times. No longer did he attack me.

I would carry the eggs over to wash and put in boxes for the neighbors to buy in the outside refrigerator. Mr. Arbuckle sold vegetables, chicken manure, eggs and the occasional chicken. (Want to learn how to prepare a chicken? Nahhh….Probably not!)

As he became more dependent on me he increased the produce and the chickens. One day he decided to put a well in next to the barn. (No longer would I have to trudge across the street with two 5 gallon buckets.) So, another neighbor, Mr. Cavanna, came over and found a branch. He began to dowse the property. In moments this branch went wild. He asked me to hold onto it. I could hardly keep it in my hands. “Eleven feet, more than enough water right here. “ Wow! I had never seen anything like that. So, as my dad, Mr. Harrison and Mr. Cavanna stood by beginning my instruction, Mr. Arbuckle sat in his chair(He was disabled.)pouring water for me. (Pretty sure they were all drinking Colt 45.) I began to dig and as the hole got wider and deeper, it was not but the following day before I was down in the slimy clay walls, with water trickling about my feet. I learned how to put in the valve and pipe and we were soon filling up around it. Running the line into the chicken coop, we bolted on a head for the crank pump. (Each day I would take some water from the previous day and prime the pump.)

In the spring I would start with picking asparagus and rhubarb, with a variety of strawberries and blackberries shortly after. During that time he would have me go to the barn and begin to pull out the seeds from the previous year. I would spend days planting everything from cucumbers, watermelons, squash, pumpkins and more. Tomatoes and pepper plants would be brought over from trades he made. I learned how to garden. Summer chores now included weeding, hoeing and refining the plants. His new dog Emmy would bark at me all day long from her age. But at the end of the day I would have money in my pocket. I got paid by the baskets for berries and I got paid for all the additional chores at $5 a day.

I learned you did not skip out on chores or bypass work.

He had to grandsons who came to visit. He often had us paint or clean around his home. One summer we were asked to paint the barn. While up on the top of Emmy’s cage, a gallon of paint “spilled” down dowsing one of them in the cage and Emmy. Red did not look good on her.

When his grandsons, Bruce and David came by we would usually get in trouble. Often we would “borrow” his big Chrysler, Chevy Impala or his Dodge pickup (I ultimately bought this 1952 pickup.) for a spin in the dirt pit behind his property. (It was here I learned why you do not shoot an arrow in the general direction of someone riding a bike from a hillside cliff. As the arrow flew towards Bruce riding in on a bike, it was only a miracle that allowed the arrow to embed itself in the front of his bicycle seat and not him.)

When he would go away I was given responsibility for things. One Saturday morning my sister and I went down to feed the animals, including the St. Barnyard. But life went different that morning. She had not had anyone visit, so when I opened the door to put her feed and water in she hit the door with so much force, I could not stop her. She bounded out in to the garage and ran at my sister. She hit her underneath her chin, pushing her into a pole. As my sister fell to the ground she took off. (Never leave garage door open!) She took off and headed towards the main road. It was many hours, but because it was so hot, she stopped running. We rescued her and I learned a lesson.

At some point I outgrew the pay and I think his wife dying knocked the steam out of him. (I will never forget kneeling beside my dad at an open coffin and seeing her chest “rise.” So out of there!) I am thankful for all the things I learned at his hand. Because of his disability I was able to have an educational and profitable opportunity. I made money for treats, trips to swim at Powers Pond and more.

Frankly, I think the world might be different if kids learned about animals, produce and work!

 

My Neighbor, Mr. Harrison.

2014-03-15 11.16.51Mr. Harrison

When I was a child we lived in a small rural community. My mother and father were always good at making friends and when we moved this time was no different. My dad’s friends were frequently considerably different than my mother’s. My dad was an Army veteran who drank hard and worked hard. And a lot of his friends were similar. Mr. Harrison was one of those friends. Continue reading My Neighbor, Mr. Harrison.