I saw a large hallway with many rooms. Some rooms were filled with books and globes and tons of antique furniture. Other rooms were large studies while others contained valuables of the world. The rooms were different. It reminded me of one of the mansions I used to visit of my mom’s friend.
“God? Where are the people?” He walked me to a large hall, and as we walked the echo of our footsteps reverberated. He lead me to a large set of double doors and opened the doors to show me the people. They were milling around the yard, the driveway, the walkways. No one moved towards the doors.
“What is the problem” I asked. “They are waiting for someone to come and open the door.” “Lord, we just opened the door.” “I know. But they do not see themselves as able or worthy to open that door. There is a key that they have already been given. (The Lord gave me a private thought in the midst of this.)
You have the key to the goodness of God. It is already given to you. No man will give you more nor will God. Open the door and come in.
My grandchildren being here for VBS took a lot of time, but was well worth it. The last few days the Lord has opened up a garden of beauty and creativity for me to investigate. I continue to move towards the end of the book on interrupted process. I add every few days core teachings for the prophetic manual and even snuck in a children’s story, my grandchildren thought was hilarious. I intend for this week to tie some things together, at the same time I have to end my relationship with our Springfield home and get things out of there.
This week 2 things have been resting on my heart. Hospitality-what does it truly look like? (Hint-it is not about you…) and Immaturity-what is our next step. (And it is not about you!) Immaturity is not a fruit of the Holy Spirit.
We do not need a generation of “his majesty the baby.” We need men who are emotionally mature. Women who operate maturely and can identify men who don’t!
Immature people are often self-centered, egotistic and selfish adults. They may have little regard for others and be preoccupied with their own thoughts and feelings (including “my ministry”). They may demand constant attention, sympathy or compliments. They may avoid participation if they can’t be special. They may obsess about impressing you.
I have a lot to put to words over time on this subject. As my friend Mark pointed out, you cannot just say “grow up” but you must see the process as well as model what it looks like. I will say one of the hardest things I ever see is the man or woman who out of immaturity struggles to be close to those who are mature and have the capability and wisdom to help them to grow. From a life coaching site-Emotionally the struggle is they often cannot handle frustration or criticism; jealous and moody. May have temper tantrums and fear any change. Relationally a person avoids and denies money and relationship problems which require integrity. Seeks people to accuse and blame.
Frankly there were three or four occurrences this week that just added fuel to my thinking on this subject. As a dad, I have advised my children on “what to look for, “and modeled this thinking for them. For instance, I found this on a national dating site.
1) He’s Decisive
2) He Takes Responsibility
3) He Has a Higher Purpose
4) He Has Close Relationships
5) He’s Capable of Expressing Himself
A few weeks ago while working on my book, I found this. (Great refrigerator reminder!)
1. My sons and daughters, choose your friends wisely in the days of your youth, for they shall determine the way you go. 2. A good friend rejoices with you in the praise of God but a bad friend fills your heart with violent thoughts. 3. A bad friend entices you to do evil but a good friend prevents you from sinning against the Lord. 4. A good friend praises you when you speak words of wisdom but a bad friend laughs when you cuss and blaspheme. 5. Good friends will rejoice with you in the days of joy that lie ahead but all the wicked together will despair in the futility of their lives. 6. The Lord knows all your thoughts, He hears every word that comes out of your mouth, and He observes all your deeds. 7. Seek, then, friends who meditate on God’s word, friends who delight in edification, and friends who are zealous in good works. For you are not unaware of the reward awaiting the righteous and you not ignorant of the punishment prepared for the wicked” (Quotes & Things David Collins-a paraphrase of Proverbs 24)
Emotional charges, childish outburst and more all stem from not understanding God’s goodness in your life.
It is as much upon the lives of the mature to dig in as it is in the life of the immature to reach out.
Single interesting tidbit-Boredom In teenagers is considered to be an area of difficulty or a “warning sign” of immaturity.
Those are some of the topics and thinking we will hit on the next few weeks. Look forward to hearing from you.
The other day I came home after doing some work and picked up my laptop. Turned it on, checked some news sites and went to Facebook. Their before me were those annoying “red dots” at the top. You know the ones; how many messages, people wanting to friend you and current news messages for you. 8 “friend requests” (clothes required to get me to click on it.), 14 messages and over 60 news clicks. I started to slip into “depression” because I had the grandchildren here and no time. I had only been away a half hour. What was I going to do? I started to get anxious.
(Today they moved them to the right of my page, so they are now at the end of my “sentences.” Those things drive me crazy!)
A few moments later I determined my daughter-in-love had used my computer for her weekly Facebook time and not signed off. Okay, but how can you leave those things not cleared?!?!?!? Incomplete tasks are too much for me. I know, I believe anything that breeds compulsion or compulsive behavior perhaps is not from God!
From my book on “Interrupted Process” that is nearly complete.
The loss of a known process can create turmoil, frustration and anxiety.
Years ago while taking a psychology class I was one of the two subjects used for an experiment. Each of us was sent outside the room with the instruction to wait until called in. While the two of us were outside the instructor explained to the class the procedure that they would witness.
The first subject was called back in and went through the procedure. A few moments later I was called into the room. I was seated at a table. They put the pieces to a small puzzle in front of me asking me to assemble it. As I moved through the puzzle, she pushed the puzzle and its pieces away, saying “NEXT!” She put 5 or 6 rubber bands in front of me and asked me to connect them. I began the process of connecting the rubber bands and moments later she picked abruptly picked them up yelling “NEXT!” She put half a dozen pencils scattered in various directions and asked me to put the points on one end and the erasers on the other. Out of the corner of my eye I saw the remaining tests. As I aligned the pencils she pushed them away yelling “NEXT!” I jumped up from the table tipping it over and walking out of the room cursing the “process.” I later returned to hear the outcome of the test.
Not being able to complete a task or leave something for tomorrow irritates my way of thinking. I am sure that some of this is “probably me” but those stupid red dots. At least don’t put numbers in them! Don’t make it harder!
I am kidding on some levels, but some things need to be just set aside. Others need time. I am working on that. I get a thought and I am “afraid” I will lose it. Yesterday I gave a fellow consultant and friend advice and counsel for a business client. I watched her painstakingly write down the thoughts, the threads and the questions. That I could do all day long. (The hard ones are when I am in the shower or somewhere I “have to remember” what I am thinking!)
So what does take time? Orson Wells , big and dramatic, in the 70’s for Gallo Winery declaring “We will sell no wine before its time.” Okay, some things just take time. (Facebook is not one of those things with “priority” scribbled all over it. Like a thief, it “takes time.”) I am working on that. Not all thoughts, prophecies or dreams are for today. Some need to be percolated like coffee, steeped like tea and nurtured like a child.
I don’t have all the answers, I assure you. Being on a team at Village with a plethora of gifts that are different than mine makes it easier. Here is the dream, here is what I see, and as I hand it over, I no longer labor on it. My part is “done” so to speak. (I will still pray and participate as we go a long.)
Sometimes I think we need to be careful that we do not become so familiar with something that we miss the fuller revelation or message with in. It’s like my wife changing the furniture around and me coming through the door, tripping over the coffee table. Tomorrow morning it may look better but fro right now I have to adjust.
Those red dots are annoying, but hey, I can turn that off. So, while my “world” changed this morning, He hasn’t.
Someone asked me what I thought equipping means. Ephesians 4:11-12 11 And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherd] and teachers, 12 to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ,Continue reading From Organic To Viral→
I see things. I see how things are going to be. I see what will happen. (I recognize I can change those things with my words. See my book, The Drones Of Heaven. A way to change your world with your words.) With that part said I am not always sure of the timing. I have also learned along the way. Continue reading Plan Do Not Project→
We often talk about potential. A seed has potential, all the DNA of the previous generations. But until it is watered, planted and sunned it is…a seed. Let your potential come forth. Be where you need to be.
A daughter’s birthday. 3 grandchildren asleep who never see their father. An early morning chat with a friend. Today is a day to reflect on my role a little as a dad.
The last few years have been “different.” My message has changed. My season has changed. And, well…I have changed. A lot of it has to do with the message I embrace. The grace of God, undiluted, without a doubt. Continue reading The Value Of Father→
Today is your birthday. Wow! So love you being my daughter!
When my first wife let me know that she was pregnant, I was ecstatic. When she was born I was no less excited. My first child. Simply amazing.
Amy was my first child. She was born in a tiny country hospital in Townshend Vermont. I will never forget. My wife and I headed to the hospital as the contractions increased. The nurse on duty did her examination, and said “go home.” A quick call by me to her doctor changed things. A few short hours later, she was brought into the world.
Nothing changes your world like a baby does. How can you so quickly fall in love with someone? But I did as I did all the rest of my children. One second I am focused on business and work and overnight I am focused on a little girl.
Every good thing bestowed and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation, or shifting shadow. James 1:17
Nothing prepares you for the first one(or actually any of them!) and so to suggest “life as usual” would be an untruth.
I watched my daughter go through life and reflect on it this morning. So here are some highlights.
You running around a 5 bedroom apartment dressed like an elf.
Playing with Zephyr, your protector.
Going to Miss Tucci’s and your day care
Taking you and your friends to the Friendly Farm.
Going to St. Michaels
Leaving St. Michaels J
Leaving Brownies after a downpour
Days in the pool at my dads
Baton Twirling and costumes
You and Max running around the house and the fields
Fishing at Silver Lake
Entering high school
Our first real argument! OK-that was not so hot.
Teaching you to drive
High School graduation-
Entering college and dropping the caravan of stuff off with your mom!
Taking you and Tyler camping at Indian Lake. (What? My pager doesn’t work here! No TV?!?!?)
Our drives back and forth to college.
Teaching you to drive and your first car!
The call from the EMT after your accident. L
College graduation!
Our trip to Indiana.
Your first job out of college.
Moving back to Vermont
Interning at Gateway
Moving to Connecticut
Getting your job after all that time temping with a $400 resume and 2 calls
Father – Daughter Motorcycle trips-(Lake George was fun!)
Engaged
Married-how sweet has this all been for you, Manley, everyone!
Is there a chapter we can put here?
In my dad’s back yard.
I am proud of who you have grown up to be.
Love you! Have an awesome day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There were two families. One was Whys and the other Wise. The Why’s were all about figuring it out and doing more. The Wise were about enjoying what had been done.
The Whys said, when asked how to be with God, “pursue, chase.”
The Wise said, “why do you chase that which has been given?” Hebrews 13:5
The Whys when asked about their “debt,” responded “pay up.”
The Wise said, “why do you try to pay that which has been paid?” 1 Corinthians 7:23
The Whys said how do you follow Jesus, “die to yourself.”
The Wise said, “why do you ‘die’ when you are already dead?” Galatians 2:20
The Whys said “let us work hard to get to Him.”
The Wise said, “why do you chase that which has been given?” Galatians 1:2
Jesus did not die for you. He died as you. The New Covenant is predicated on a covenant between God and God. You have been crucified, died, been buried (those three took care of the Adamic nature) and quickened, raised and seated with Him.
The difference between a servant and a son is how you identify with Christ.
Do not let lyrics or words put you in bondage. We labor to enter His rest. It was on the day of rest, man came forth. It is from rest we move and have our being. Do not ever have to ask “who has bewitched you.” It is not wise to be Whys.
It is more than just a place to go. It may be how you get there.
Too often we find ourselves waiting for the right time. When this happens I will do this. When that happens I will do that. The difficulty is we find ourselves waiting for a day or a circumstance or a sign.
As a believer my life is seated in heavenly places outside the realms or constraints of time. And if my life is in heavenly places, with no time, then the question can be posed, what am I waiting for?
Over the years inside and outside the church people are holding on to various things. Some real, some superstitious, some perceived. For instance, in the world we look for signs of good fortune or good luck. We might visit our favorite Chinese restaurant and indulge in a meal, followed by what the world has deigned fortune cookies and I think of as prophecy cookies. Either way we tear open a plastic wrapped morsel, breaking the cookie to read a small white piece of paper. It matters little what is said, but if you have been waiting or hoping, you may well find an answer. (God is not constrained by our narrow minded thinking…he used a donkey!)
What is at the heart of it, is you are looking for direction. Your comfort zone may be undergoing rehabilitation. I get it! You may feel you need more than direction, that you need encouragement.
I thought about this last night. I was waiting for my wife to arrive with my grandchildren. While preparing dinner, I would walk over to the window and look down to the parking area. When they got here, I wanted them to see me looking at them, ringing them in. Why? Because I want them to know I have expectancy!
I thought just like the father of the prodigal son who waited each day. Probably in the same place, walking back and forth perhaps, providing himself with the best view of where his son might come from. I am sure that there were many days where a tear ran down his face. Days where he questioned his parenting ability. Days where he might have cried out. Days where other family members and servants noticed his disappointment.
When we are waiting for an answer, we go through waves of emotions and turmoil. A few weeks ago, I simply said to God, “I am not taking another step. I have done what I believe to be right. I have done all that I know how to do.” Weeks later, nothing has changed, but I can say I am OK.
I am not looking for a sign or a circumstance. I am looking for Him. When I say that, I mean this. I am open to whatever manner, shape or form God would like to use to provide me with an answer. When I get on something, I cannot move away from it. I become one with the “answer” who in this case is the ANSWER. It is Him. I am not looking for a sign nor am I tossing a fleece. What appeals to my emotions may not be right for me long term. (I am not throwing away emotions!)
I do, however look to whatever way, shape or form God may desire to speak to me. I am open to His answer. I may see things during the course of the day that emphasize or enhance what I believe God is already saying to me. God is speaking a lot. He uses creation, He uses friends and He uses a lot, but the really neat part of it all, is “I know His voice!” When He speaks in whatever manner, I am convinced of what He may be saying. I am not throwing out a rope and hoping He catches it and pulls me up but I simply believe He has endowed me with His goodness, with His nature. And the more I focus on how good He is to me, the less I rely on alternative methods to reduce my discomfort or release my worries. When he tells me to “be anxious for nothing” I can take that to the “bank.”
So, is there a right time? I think there may be. It is probably when you recognize how good He is, how amazing His preparation is and how wonderful His habitation is. (You!) When this is determined you then realize that you are comfortable in Him and everything starts to click into place. It is not a situation or a circumstance that has set you free from the bondage, making you free, but it is Him. Devotion or focusing on Him makes the rest all fit together.
To answer the other question of what am I waiting for, my answer is simply nothing. Oh, I understand the chiros moments in one’s life and the seasons, but when we recognize our wrapped up position with Him, we see that it is all ours, all now. There is on the horizon a seasonless existence. One freed of the constraints of time. When we see that we have become ONE with Him, we recognize the needlessness of seeking a situation or an answer. (I am not saying stop what you are doing and give up. Do what He has called you to do.)
I feel I must add this. I see too many who are wrapped up in their gift, focused on their destiny, when in fact there is a rest He provided from that as well. When you learn to rest in Him, your destiny is not the destination but the place He is going WITH you. When you find yourself anxious about where you are going or what you might do when you get there, you will find yourself missing out on the excitement of being in the moment with Him. While you are headed down the road to grandma’s house, He is wanting to show you the rocks and the pebbles that David that were hidden from the days of Noah. He wants to show you the beauty of the flowers, the freedom of the butterflies, the song of the birds and rustle of the creatures. H wants to hold your hand and hang out. You will get to grandmas. But you will miss the experience of being with Him.
Do not trade the treasures of today for the thoughts of tomorrow. His blessings and mercies are new EVERY morning.
